When actions don’t speak louder than words…



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As a child, I grew up seeing my paternal grandfather adhering to his principles, for he was a man of his word. I often wondered how he could keep up with all the promises that he made in his lifetime despite adversities. And that’s what probably inspired me to stick to my word, and I believed that the world too follows the same principles.

With time, when I exposed myself to this “big bad world” I realised not all believed in keeping up their commitments, for as they say, “promises are meant to be broken”! Scandalised and deeply disturbed by the way most people handle precarious situations and falter, I started searching for answers within.

After putting personal experiences and certain observations into account, I realised that a person’s word is no longer dear to him. I vividly remember watching films and even people saying it in real life that they would die, but never go back on their words. The impact of films was such that even now, ‘Maine Zaban Di Hai’ (I have committed) is what keeps resonating in my mind whenever I make a commitment.

I even remember my maternal grandmother telling me about how great her husband was and what he used to do to live by his word. For men in those days, making promises and executing them were dearer than anything else, perhaps the most important thing of their existence.

But now, I feel there is dearth of people like them. People talk big but fail to give practical and literal references to their words. I am not talking about men alone. It could even be women. People seem to have turned extremely commitment phobic, hence all the frustrations and chaos.

Commitment for me is not specific to relationships. It could be towards one’s profession, one’s attitude towards life and one’s equation with the outside world.

I can recall a simple case of a very dear friend of mine who gets paranoid on hearing about marriage. He is someone who deeply is into a relationship, but doesn’t want it to culminate into marriage. By being so unstable, he is indeed ruining his and the girl’s life he is dating.

Similarly, there’s another friend of mine, who believes in switching jobs at the blink of an eye. I fail to understand how can one not be sure of what he/she wants to do next?

For an individual, commitment towards oneself needs to be on the priority list. But by not doing justice to themselves, people are in fact making fools out of their own selves. They are also not building a good reputation in front of others.

I am not quite sure if the complexities of modern life force people to shy away from keeping up with their commitments or are there other reasons.

But what ever the reasons maybe, one should be very clear of what they want in and from life. Because by giving room to confusions and waywardness, they sow seeds for an unstable future where they wouldn’t know where they are heading.

Remember how Arjun from the Mahabharata turned into the best archer of all times? When asked by his Guru if his point of focus was the bird he was aiming at, Arjun promptly said that he has his eyes fixed on the bird’s eye only. That goes to show how focused Arjun was in his life and how committed he was towards his passion- archery.

In a fit of the moment, people nowadays make tall promises but with time their words go down the drain. It’s almost like showing disrespect to the tongue that God has only gifted to humans, and that’s the only thing that makes us superior than other living beings.

Life teaches us to weigh our words; for we never know when we might get ditched by someone and be reminded of what we did to someone else. I am no counselor to show my expertise on commitment phobia, but I do know one thing for sure- words uttered must be respected, especially when they are aimed at giving someone hope.

Turn your commitment into a reality and tell yourself that integrity should triumph over scepticism all your life.