Parrot Prophecies

By Vineet Sharma | Updated: Jul 14, 2010, 10:24 AM IST

XX April, 2011<br/><br/>I was living a dream! India, my country, my love was in the final of the 2011 ODI World Cup and I had plush VIP passes for the night of my life at DY Patil Stadium. I say ‘was’ because the first thing I saw on TV upon opening my eyes was the bone shivering news that ‘Topu’, the cricket predicting parrot who had beaten a gamut of many other gifted animals in the biggest reality show ever, had been killed by foreign agents ahead of the India-Pakistan dream final.<br/><br/>At first I could not fathom the magnitude of the death, but slowly as it hit me, my lungs caved-in. How could we win the World Cup, the tournament that has been dominated by India and Pakistan, led by the superb run of form by Sachin and Akhtar, without Topu?<br/><br/>I mean these cricketers did give it their all and it was the best battle of the willow and the leather the world had seen in a long time, but this all was true due to Topu’s predictions. He had predicted India’s loss in the first round and then recovering from then forth, he was the one who had rightly predicted that Sachin Tendulkar would lead with his best brand of cricket ever. I mean the guy’s been around for decades and has made records, but this World Cup he was super special cause it was the positive karma of Topu that had helped him pluck the only missing feather in his cap.<br/><br/>Don’t believe in Topu yet? He was the one who predicted that unexpected magical spell by Viru, the first double hat-trick in a World Cup. He was the one who told us that Pakistan would humble the mighty Australians. The Pontings, Dhonis, Collingwoods and Sangakkaras would have been nothing if dear ‘Topu’ the parrot hadn’t predicted so.<br/><br/>And you don’t have to take my word on this one, you- yes you, were also keeping a tab on his slightest moves all the time. Hooked onto your TV sets, computers, palmtops and what not, you also saw the magic unfold in front of your very eyes. The intellectuals of the world were all discussing him, every news channel that was credible enough covered it live, breaking news pouring in from all quarters. C’mon, the journalists are the bearers of truth and if they deemed it more appropriate than the uncontrolled oil spill, they must have been right.<br/><br/>Even my friend’s friend made lakhs of rupees betting on Topu’s predictions. Hard money talks if nothing else does, and India’s pride Topu was perfect testimony to it. All lost now that the soothsaying bird has been slain by those who wished a bleaker world.<br/><br/>We are at a juncture when Kapil’s Devils are waiting to be joined by Dhoni’s Warriors but this insincere government could not provide Z++ Grade security to Topu, the second most important creature India needed to keep secure after Ajmal Kasab. Now, I simply stare at the void in the mirror of glory, dejected before the first ball is even bowled… Sorry India, I hope we find a Paul octopus this time...Or maybe a whale or something.