Sex, drugs and `halal` comedy in Pakistan...

A stand-up comedian of Pakistani origin claims she was asked to stick to "halal comedy".

Islamabad: A stand-up comedian of Pakistani origin, who performed in the country recently, claims she was asked to stick to "halal comedy" but was offered a "marijuana joint" and a "Russian hooker for the night" after a show.

British-born Shazia Mirza was told by organisers of her shows that she could joke about anything except "religion, politics, drugs". "...you can swear and curse, just don`t mention `The Sex`," Mirza wrote in a column for an Australian daily. When she arrived in Lahore, a customs official mistook her for a spy. When Mirza told him she was a stand-up comedian, he asked: "What`s that?" Mirza was also surprised to find security in place during her performance at the prestigious Lahore University of Management Sciences. "The fact that there needed to be security at all to tell jokes indicated danger. Pakistan is a sexually repressed country, and that is the root of many of its problems," she wrote. But before she took to the stage, armed security personnel told her: "Be careful, it`s best you only do halal comedy". "Halal comedy? There is no such thing. That`s like saying, I only eat halal bacon," Mirza wrote. In Karachi, the organiser explained to Mirza that the Pakistani Taliban are infiltrating the outskirts of the port city and so she should be careful about what she said. "It`s best not to talk about religion, or sex, and don`t mention the word `gay`". When she asked "why", the organiser told her "because gay doesn`t exist in Pakistan". The organiser also warned her against jokes about President Asif Ali Zardari. "There is a law against making any jokes about President Zardari," the organiser said. Yet Mirza joked about Zardari and "the audience laughed like they had never laughed before". In fact, according to Mirza, all the things the audience laughed at were things they were most repressed about. "Jokes about sex, religion and politics got the most laughter," she wrote. After the show, Mirza was invited to a party and offered a joint of marijuana, followed by a joint of opium, then vodka and then a discussion on porn. "I was then offered a male Russian hooker for the night," she wrote. "There it is, the hypocrisy of a sexually repressed, censored society: I can`t say `gay` on stage, but after the show, opium and prostitutes are on offer," she concluded. PTI