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Couples, do steer clear of arguments

Mumbai: Couples who argue a lot spend ten days a year not speaking to each other.

You`ve heard the saying that small arguments between couples are healthy as they help strengthen the bonds of love. But what about the after effects of these arguments. According to a survey, an average married couple has two arguments a week each of which results in the `silent treatment` for an average of two hours and 14 minutes. Add it up and the result: couples spend almost 10 days in a year not speaking to each other. So why is it that couples argue?

The reasons are plenty and diverse, but two of the most common reasons, as per the findings of the study, are that either one of the partner has said the wrong thing and the feeling is that the partner is taking him/ her for granted.

We are living in a jet paced world where `instant` is the key word we all swear by, be it instant home delivered food or groceries. However, counsellors are just as quick to point out that this fast paced modern life means that couples are growing increasingly prone to rowing. Add to this the ever increasing pressures of successfully managing both, the home and work. Counsellors claim that they are not at all surprised at the amount of time couples spend not speaking to each other.

One counsellor was quoted by a newspaper as saying, "It`s very easy to snap at one another when you are stressed, especially if the couple live in a big city where there is always a crunch of me-time. She goes on to add that the only way to work around this problem is for the couple to be disciplined about spending quality time together. Couples should not become overwhelmed by work.

The key to doing it right is communication. A lot of couples don`t have time to communicate or they are just so tired that all they want to do is sit in front of the TV set watching some mindless programmes.

Besides the two prominent reasons (as mentioned above) there are also some other fundamental issues that made it to the list including disagreements over child-rearing, being shunned in the bedroom, jealousy over friendships and never going out together as a couple.

Sometimes silence can be best for both parties. It’s better to give each other the silent treatment than have a raging row as it gives you a chance to calm down and think about things.

ANI

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