Have you ever met someone who showered you with compliments, gifts, and attention within a few days of knowing you? Did they make you feel special and loved, only to disappear or change their behavior later? If yes, then you might have been a victim of love bombing. Love bombing is a term that describes a manipulative strategy of overwhelming someone with signs of affection and admiration. It is often used by people who want to get something from the other person, such as a job, a favor, or confidential information. It is also a common tactic of narcissists, cults, and abusive partners who want to control and exploit their targets.
The term love bombing was coined by Jim Jones, the leader of the Peoples Temple cult, who used it to describe the way he attracted and retained his followers. He would lavish them with praise, gifts, and affection, and make them feel like they were part of a special community. He would also isolate them from their friends and family, and demand their loyalty and obedience.
Love bombing works by exploiting the human need for validation and belonging. It creates a powerful bond between the love bomber and the target, who feels seen, heard, and appreciated. The target may also feel guilty or ungrateful for questioning or rejecting the love bomber’s advances.
However, love bombing is not genuine or lasting. It is a calculated and deceptive technique that serves the love bomber’s ulterior motives. Once the love bomber gets what they want from the target, they may withdraw their attention, become abusive, or move on to another target.
Love bombing can have serious psychological and emotional consequences for the target. Some of them are:
Confusion: The target may feel confused about their own feelings and reality. They may wonder why the love bomber changed their behavior so drastically, or what they did wrong to cause it. They may also doubt their own judgment and intuition.
Low self-esteem: The target may feel unworthy of love and respect. They may blame themselves for the love bomber’s actions, or think that they deserve to be treated poorly. They may also lose confidence in their abilities and potential.
Anxiety: The target may feel anxious about pleasing the love bomber or avoiding their wrath. They may also feel anxious about losing the love bomber’s approval or attention. They may develop symptoms of stress, such as insomnia, headaches, or stomach problems.
Depression: The target may feel depressed about their situation and future. They may feel hopeless, helpless, and isolated. They may also experience feelings of sadness, guilt, shame, or anger.
Trauma: The target may suffer from trauma as a result of the love bomber’s abuse or manipulation. They may have flashbacks, nightmares, or intrusive thoughts about the love bomber. They may also develop post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), which can affect their mental health and well-being.
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