Is it normal to have rare sexual intercourse?

Updated: Oct 31, 2010, 20:26 PM IST

Many people wonder whether they have intercourse too seldom or too often. Here is the answer.

What is a normal frequency?

The usual dose is twice or three times a week, but many people have intercourse more often. Some stick to a rather consistent schedule – others like more intense weekends after pauses. If you make love less than twice a week, this shows that you can get more out of the situation, unless you know from your experience that having intercourse less frequently is optimal for you.

Classic orgasm doesn’t promise frequent intercourse

People who often have coital orgasm usually decide to have fewer climaxes than those who mix coitus with oral, manual and other kinds of intercourse that increase the number of climaxes achieved by most men.

You have to find your own combination, dependent on your responsiveness: if either of the partners needs more, you can satisfy his/her needs with additional techniques and coordinate them with yours. Frequency declines with age, but there is no age at which you can’t be taken by surprise at a special occasion. Therefore, don’t worry about frequency (and don’t worry if your friends say they have intercourse more often than you).

It is normal to have intercourse less and less often?

Sexual intercourse doesn’t mean collecting points. You have to be aware that there will be moments when you or your partner simply won’t be in the mood for sexual intercourse – because you’re tired, working overtime, etc. – thus, don’t force other people or yourself to follow a schedule. Just think about what exactly you want. It’s advisable to follow your feelings.

The loop is as follows: most people know well (either they read about it or follow their intuition) that sexual desire fluctuates and declines with age in most cases. That’s why it’s good to know that attractiveness can’t be constantly upgraded and maintained. The chemical processes at the physical level largely determine frequency of sexual intercourse. You can do a lot by being aware of it, thus investing more in a relationship every year and stirring up the sexual desire of you and your partner.